Sitting on the highway waiting to catch speeders,
a state police officer saw a car puttering along at 22 M.P.H. He thinks to
himself, that car is just as dangerous as a speeder. So, he turns his lights on and
pulls the car over. Approaching the car, he notices there are 5 old ladies,
two at the front and 3 at the back, wide eyed and looking like
The driver obviously confused said,"Officer, I don't understand,
I wasn't doing over the speed limit!, What seems to be the problem?" "Ma'am,"
the officer said, "you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can
also be dangerous". "Slower than the speed limit? NO SIR! I was doing exactly 22
miles an hour", the old woman said proudly.
The officer containing a
chuckle explains that 22 was the route number, not the speed limit. A bit
embarrassed, the woman grinned, thanking the officer for pointing out her error.
"Before I go Ma'am, I have to ask, is everyone OK?
These women seem badly
shaken and haven't uttered a word all this time" "Oh! they will be alright in a
minute, Officer, we just got off Route 142."
Posted on 08/21/2013 06:48 PM
0 Comments The young Monk
A young monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to helping the
other monks in copying the old canons and laws of the church by hand. He
notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies, not
from the original manuscript.
So, the new monk goes to the head
abbot to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small
error in the first copy, it would never be picked up. In fact, that
error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies.
head monk says, "We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but
you make a good point, my son." So, he goes down into the dark caves
underneath the monastery where the original manuscripts are held as
archives in a locked vault that hasn't been opened for hundreds of
Hours go by and nobody sees the old abbot. So, the young
monk gets worried and goes down to look for him. He sees him banging his
head against the wall and wailing, "We missed the "R", we missed the
"R". His forehead is all bloody and bruised and he is crying
The young monk asks the old abbot, "What's
wrong, father?" With a choking voice, the old abbot replies, "The word
Posted on 08/07/2013 09:47 PM
0 Comments Jesus and a Democrat
A Republican, in
a wheelchair, entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a
cup of coffee. The Republican looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that
Jesus sitting over there?" The waitress nodded "yes," so the Republican
requested that she give Jesus a cup of coffee, on him. The next patron to come
in was a Libertarian, with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth,
painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced
across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus, over there?" The
waitress nodded, so the Libertarian asked her to give Jesus a cup of hot tea,
"My treat." The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Democrat on
crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down, and hollered, "Hey there honey!
How's about getting me a cold mug of Miller Light?" He too looked across the
restaurant and asked, "Isn't that God's boy over there?" The waitress nodded, so
the Democrat directed her to give Jesus a cold beer. "On my bill," he said
loudly. As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Republican, touched him, and
said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Republican felt the strength come
back into his legs, got up, and began to praise the Lord. Jesus passed by the
Libertarian, touched him, and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The
Libertarian felt his back straightening up, and he raised his hands, and he
began to praise the Lord. Then, Jesus walked towards the Democrat, just smiling.
The Democrat jumped up and yelled, "Don't touch me ... I'm on
For Those Who
Understand, No Explanation Is necessary.
For Those Who Do
Not Understand, No Explanation Is
Posted on 08/07/2013 08:42 PM
0 Comments Bill Cosby speak's the truth
BILL HAS GONE AND DONE IT
They're standing on the corner and they can't speak English.
I can't even talk the way these people talk: Why you ain't,
Where you is, What he drive, Where he stay,
Where he work, Who you be... And I blamed the kid until I heard the
mother talk. And then I heard the father talk. Everybody knows it's
important to speak English except these knuckleheads. You can't be a doctor with
that kind of crap coming out of your mouth. In fact you will never get any
kind of job making a decent living.
People marched and were hit in the
face with rocks to get an Education, and now we've got these knuckleheads
walking around. The lower economic people are not holding up their end in
this deal. These people are not parenting. They are buying things for kids.
$500 sneakers for what? And they won't spend $200 for Hooked on
I am talking about these people who cry when their son is
standing there in an orange suit. Where were you when he was 2? Where
were you when he was 12? Where were you when he was 18 and how come you
didn't know that he had a pistol? And where is the father? Or who is his
father? People putting their clothes on backward: Isn't that a sign of
something gone wrong? People with their hats on backward, pants down around
the crack, isn't that a sign of something?
Isn't it a sign of something
when she has her dress all the way up and got all type of needles [piercing]
going through her body? What part of Africa did this come from?? We are
not Africans. Those people are not Africans; they don't know a thing about
I say this all of the time. It would be like white people
saying they are European-American. That is totally stupid. I was born here,
and so were my parents and grand parents and, very likely my great grandparents.
I don't have any connection to Africa, no more than white Americans have to
Germany , Scotland , England , Ireland , or the Netherlands . The same applies
to 99 percent of all the black Americans as regards to Africa . So stop,
already! ! ! With names like Shaniqua, Taliqua and Mohammed and all of that
crap ......... And all of them are in jail.
Brown or black versus the
Board of Education is no longer the white person's problem. We have got to
take the neighborhood back. People used to be ashamed. Today a woman has
eight children with eight different 'husbands' -- or men or whatever you call
them now. We have millionaire football players who cannot read. We have
million-dollar basketball players who can't write two paragraphs. We, as black
folks have to do a better job. Someone working at Wal-Mart with seven kids,
you are hurting us. We have to start holding each other to a higher
standard.. We cannot blame the white people any longer.'
William Henry 'Bill' Cosby, Jr., Ed..D.
Posted on 07/16/2013 08:30 PM
0 Comments Ethanol Leading to a Corn based Bubble
A corn-based bubble is building on the horizon, with expectations of a
large oversupply of high-priced ethanol that has nowhere to go.
The phenomenon is a product of environmental requirements and
subsidies that are currently leading refiners to buy ethanol at record
prices, according to analysis from the U.S. Energy Information
Refiners and other parties that produce fuels are required by the
U.S. Environmental Protection Agency to buy supplies of ethanol to blend
with their gasoline. For each gallon of ethanol they blend into their
fuel, refiners get a credit, also known as a Renewable Identification
Number, or RIN.
Refiners need to acquire a set amount of RINs annually to meet EPA
requirements, and can also do so by buying RINs from other parties.
While the current supply of corn-based ethanol is down, because of a
drought that affected production, output is expected to grow to levels
that will leave the country with an oversupply of the fuel that will go
unused unless something changes.
That’s because the EPA is requiring refiners to buy more ethanol at a
time when fuel makers say they can’t blend any more of it into their
The nation’s consumption of gasoline is falling and refiners say they
can only replace 10 percent of their main gasoline blend with ethanol.
Ten percent of the nation’s expected 2013 gasoline consumption 13.3
billion gallons, a volume of ethanol that would fall within the mandate
this year. But 10 percent of gasoline consumption will likely fall short
of mandates in the future, EIA analyst Sean Hill said.
While the EPA and U.S. Department of Energy have insisted that
gasoline blends including as much as 15 percent ethanol is safe for most
vehicles, automakers and the oil industry have disagreed.
Without marketing more of a higher blend of ethanol, refineries could
be left blending ethanol into gasoline that is not used, just to meet
EPA requirements, Hill said.
An alternative could be for refiners to start making more E85, which is a blend of gasoline with 85 percent ethanol, Hill said.
But most gasoline stations do not sell E85 and the majority of fuel
makers have no way of changing retail stations to sell more of that
Posted on 06/11/2013 05:35 PM
0 Comments Soy Sauce Overdose Sends Teen Into Coma
A 19-year-old survived a dangerous sodium overdose after drinking more than a quart of soy sauce on a dare, according to a case study in the Journal of Emergency Medicine.
After drinking a quart of the sodium-heavy condiment, the teenager
slipped into coma with seizure-like activity. He was rushed to the
hospital, where doctors determined he was suffering from hypernatremia, a metabolic condition in which there is a salt imbalance in the bodily fluids.
Eventually doctors determined that he had ingested 160 to 170 grams of
sodium from the soy sauce, a potentially lethal dose for his weight and
build. He had effectively overdosed on sodium.
"He didn't respond to any of the stimuli that we gave him," Dr. David J. Carlberg, who treated the patient as an emergency room physician at University of Virginia Medical Center, told LiveScience. "He had some clonus, which is just elevated reflexes. It's a sign that basically the nervous system wasn't working very well."
According to the NIH, severe hypernatremia can result in excessive
sodium in bodily fluid, which causes excess water to flow into cells to
balance sodium levels.
While some cells can handle the swelling, in brain cells the excess
swelling can lead to neurological damage or death. Other symptoms
include mental confusion, convulsions, fatigue, and nausea.
While in the past, doctors slowly lowered sodium levels in patients
suffering from hypernatremia in order to protect the body from further
shock, in this case doctors worked quickly to lower the patient's sodium level
as soon as possible to protect his brain. They quickly tried to flush
the salt from his system with a water-and-sugar-based solution in an
effort to protect his brain from lasting damage.
Eventually the doctors were able to stabilize the patient, even though
he remained in a coma. After three days he woke up from the coma without
suffering any lasting neurological damage.
While death from sodium is incredibly rare, it is not unheard of.
According to the case study's authors, in ancient China, salt overdoses
were one traditional way to commit suicide.
Posted on 06/10/2013 05:21 AM
0 Comments USAF TOOK NANCY 'S JET AWAY
USAF TOOK NANCY
'S JET AWAY (verified by
reason that Nancy Pelosi is considering retiring is that they took her Jet
away. Ah, poor baby!
As a result of a Judicial Watch filing under the
Freedom of Information Act, the USAF released documents detailing House Speaker
Pelosi's use of United States Air Force aircraft between March 2009 and June
2010. The data are published in the Judicial Watch Verdict of December 2010,
Volume 16, Issue 12.
Here are the main highlights revealed by the USAF.
Keep in mind that all the data below relate to United States Air Force aircraft
used by one woman over a sixteen month period.
Several of these flights
included Ms. Pelosi's guests, such as grown children, grandchildren, various
in-laws, friends and hangers-on. Over 95% of the trips were between the west
coast and Washington , DC , for what you might call a commute between home and
the office. READ it and WEEP!!
>Total trips: 85 over a 68 week period,
or 1.25 average trips per week. >Total mileage: 206,264 miles, or 2,427
average miles per trip. >Total flying time: 428.6 hours, or an average of
5 hours per trip. >Cost to the taxpayers: $2,100,744, or $27,715 per trip,
or $1,285,162 per year! >Cost of in flight food and alcohol: $101,429;
$1,193 per trip; $62,051 per year.
On one junket to Baghdad, according to
the Air Force report, she had the aircraft bar stocked with Johnny Walker Red
Scotch, Grey Goose Vodka, E&J Brandy, Bailey's Irish Cream, Maker's Mark
Whiskey, Courvoisier Cognac, Bacardi Rum, Jim Beam Whiskey, Beefeater Gin,
Dewar's Scotch, Bombay Sapphire Gin, Jack Daniels Whiskey, Corona Beer and
several varieties of wine. This was obviously a very important "gubment bidness"
Evidence generally speaks for itself, and in Ms. Pelosi's case it
speaks the language of abuse and (evidently) a serious familial drinking
problem, for in a single year she and her spawn drank an amount in excess of the
net income of the average employed American! When she said, "... If the stimulus
doesn't pass, five hundred million people might lose their jobs...", I thought
she was unintentionally revealing her ignorance. I'm now more inclined to think
she was pickled.
Even though she can no longer abuse the USAF, she can
either fly on her broom, or fly Southwest Airlines, where bags fly